Airline: Turkish Airlines
Destination : Bratislava (via Vienna)
Duration of stay: 5 days
This time I was heading to Bratislava accompanied by a colleague. He’s supposed to help me out on the exhibition that will take place in this small European city. Since there were no direct flights to Bratislava we had to land in Vienna and rent a car that would take us to Bratislava. Costs? Around 50 Euros. Both cities are separated by 70 km. First day, we go to the exhibition hall and see how our booth is developing. Pretty simple; no gimmicks. Looked okay. The rest of the day we have off so we do a little sightseeing strumming to the city streets. What can be said about Bratislava? Some of the buildings are in decay but nonetheless it is a European city but you could still feel the effects of the communist regime. At least, that was what I thought when I saw the tram that looked pretty old to me. We took a flat for one week and the building looked like a survivor of WWII. But the flat itself was nicely decorated and it was huge. High ceilings and nice furniture. I took a room with twin beds whereas my colleague, who happens to be my superior, took the king size bed. Douche! The agency that rented the flat was placed inside the same building and was run by two nice looking girls. I hate to make any sort of generalization in life and I did fare pretty well with this philosophy so far. However, I need to say one thing about the girls here. They are all BEAUTIFUL. I don’t know how that happens but one thing is a fact: They have good genes!
The city itself was nice too. It looked like any other European city. The old city has a nice flair. Old buildings, a nice castle, nice opera house, chic restaurants, a nice park, etc.. People speak English…more or less. But I will touch this topic later on..
The second day we started with the exhibition where we are presenting products to a non-present audience. NOONE CAME to our booth.
That sucked but what sucked even more was that my colleague was pulling out a valve from the box (and that thing is heavy! ) and I heard a sound that went ‘click’!. My colleague crumbled with pain and he couldn’t move. He moaned with pain trying to stand up but that was not possible. I helped him to a chair where he sat half-assed (literally) and moaned with pain. Poor chap. We waited 20-30 minutes but it didn’t get any better. It was obvious that this guy needed to be in a hospital. So I went to the doctor of the exhibition ground and tried to explain him the situation. But surprise, surprise! No Hablo English Sir…of course, he didn’t say it in Spanish but I guessed he was trying to tell me exactly this in his native language. So I pulled the guy by his sleeve showing him the direction to our booth. Doctor took a look at my colleague and said one thing that I understood immediately: Ambulance! Holy Fuck!
So ambulance it was…but what a bunch of idiots they were…they were almost killing my colleague. They tried to carry him by picking up by his sleeves but the guy couldn’t move. And none of them spoke English. However, the doctor of the ambulance spoke bits and pieces of German and was fluent in French. I tried to explain them with my humble knowledge of French that the guy needed a shot of painkiller. The doctor checked him there and said: No hospital necessary. Your friend needs to rest. I will give him a painkiller and in 4-5 hours he will be fine.
4-5 hours??? My ass!
So we went to our flat where the crew from the ambulance helped my colleague to put him to bed. My colleague kept mumbling all sorts of swear words but that didn’t change the fact that he was chained to this bed for the next hours. So we waited. There was no point for me to going back to the exhibition. The day was a waste anyway. I checked upon him a couple of hours later but he was sleeping so I went out to eat something. Found a Pizza-Hut. Good enough. I did some shopping for the flat. When I got back to the apartment my colleague had some news for me. To be honest I expected him to be up and walking around but he told me the magical words that doomed me for the whole week: Dude, I still can’t move!! Oh crap, crap…
You want to know something else? Sure…I need to take a piss. Whaaaaaaatt?? How am I supposed to carry this 100 kg guy to the loop? No way Jose. So I did the next best thing: I got him an empty bottle and he filled it completely with his yellow fluid…for a moment he was a happy man.
But the news kept getting better: Dude, I’m hungry…can you prepare me something? Sure, so I made him a sandwich and that was pretty much the routine of the whole week. I went off to the exhibition in the morning, leaving him sandwiches and something to drink and of course…empty bottles. After a week the apartment was stinking urine and the room was filled with bottles full of piss. There were everywhere bottles and I couldn’t touch them. I know what you’re thinking. What an ass!! Hey man, I don’t get that much of money from my company and there is no clause in my contract that says: nursing the boss is obligatory.
However, when the exhibition was finally over my buddy still couldn’t move and all our intentions to get him into a hospital failed due to the fact that the ambulance doctor showed up each time saying that my buddy was going to be fine the next day. Five days passed and there was no improvement in sight so I called the airline and arranged an ambulance that would take us to airport in Vienna. To make a long story short: We landed safely in Istanbul and another ambulance took my colleague to a hospital. He had somehow managed to hurt a disc in his back and that was pretty risky. He got better a month or so later. So what do we learn from this? Learn Russian when you’re travelling to former communist countries, get a travel-health-insurance and do not lift heavy objects, especially when you’re old and weak and not as strong and muscle-built as this blog writer.
Soundtrack of this trip: You can’t save me – Richie Kotzen
Destination : Bratislava (via Vienna)
Duration of stay: 5 days
This time I was heading to Bratislava accompanied by a colleague. He’s supposed to help me out on the exhibition that will take place in this small European city. Since there were no direct flights to Bratislava we had to land in Vienna and rent a car that would take us to Bratislava. Costs? Around 50 Euros. Both cities are separated by 70 km. First day, we go to the exhibition hall and see how our booth is developing. Pretty simple; no gimmicks. Looked okay. The rest of the day we have off so we do a little sightseeing strumming to the city streets. What can be said about Bratislava? Some of the buildings are in decay but nonetheless it is a European city but you could still feel the effects of the communist regime. At least, that was what I thought when I saw the tram that looked pretty old to me. We took a flat for one week and the building looked like a survivor of WWII. But the flat itself was nicely decorated and it was huge. High ceilings and nice furniture. I took a room with twin beds whereas my colleague, who happens to be my superior, took the king size bed. Douche! The agency that rented the flat was placed inside the same building and was run by two nice looking girls. I hate to make any sort of generalization in life and I did fare pretty well with this philosophy so far. However, I need to say one thing about the girls here. They are all BEAUTIFUL. I don’t know how that happens but one thing is a fact: They have good genes!
The city itself was nice too. It looked like any other European city. The old city has a nice flair. Old buildings, a nice castle, nice opera house, chic restaurants, a nice park, etc.. People speak English…more or less. But I will touch this topic later on..
The second day we started with the exhibition where we are presenting products to a non-present audience. NOONE CAME to our booth.
That sucked but what sucked even more was that my colleague was pulling out a valve from the box (and that thing is heavy! ) and I heard a sound that went ‘click’!. My colleague crumbled with pain and he couldn’t move. He moaned with pain trying to stand up but that was not possible. I helped him to a chair where he sat half-assed (literally) and moaned with pain. Poor chap. We waited 20-30 minutes but it didn’t get any better. It was obvious that this guy needed to be in a hospital. So I went to the doctor of the exhibition ground and tried to explain him the situation. But surprise, surprise! No Hablo English Sir…of course, he didn’t say it in Spanish but I guessed he was trying to tell me exactly this in his native language. So I pulled the guy by his sleeve showing him the direction to our booth. Doctor took a look at my colleague and said one thing that I understood immediately: Ambulance! Holy Fuck!
So ambulance it was…but what a bunch of idiots they were…they were almost killing my colleague. They tried to carry him by picking up by his sleeves but the guy couldn’t move. And none of them spoke English. However, the doctor of the ambulance spoke bits and pieces of German and was fluent in French. I tried to explain them with my humble knowledge of French that the guy needed a shot of painkiller. The doctor checked him there and said: No hospital necessary. Your friend needs to rest. I will give him a painkiller and in 4-5 hours he will be fine.
4-5 hours??? My ass!
So we went to our flat where the crew from the ambulance helped my colleague to put him to bed. My colleague kept mumbling all sorts of swear words but that didn’t change the fact that he was chained to this bed for the next hours. So we waited. There was no point for me to going back to the exhibition. The day was a waste anyway. I checked upon him a couple of hours later but he was sleeping so I went out to eat something. Found a Pizza-Hut. Good enough. I did some shopping for the flat. When I got back to the apartment my colleague had some news for me. To be honest I expected him to be up and walking around but he told me the magical words that doomed me for the whole week: Dude, I still can’t move!! Oh crap, crap…
You want to know something else? Sure…I need to take a piss. Whaaaaaaatt?? How am I supposed to carry this 100 kg guy to the loop? No way Jose. So I did the next best thing: I got him an empty bottle and he filled it completely with his yellow fluid…for a moment he was a happy man.
But the news kept getting better: Dude, I’m hungry…can you prepare me something? Sure, so I made him a sandwich and that was pretty much the routine of the whole week. I went off to the exhibition in the morning, leaving him sandwiches and something to drink and of course…empty bottles. After a week the apartment was stinking urine and the room was filled with bottles full of piss. There were everywhere bottles and I couldn’t touch them. I know what you’re thinking. What an ass!! Hey man, I don’t get that much of money from my company and there is no clause in my contract that says: nursing the boss is obligatory.
Soundtrack of this trip: You can’t save me – Richie Kotzen
